Without You I am nothing

I feel like lately I haven’t been giving God the time He deserves, time when I’m fully there, completely listening, and totally absorbed in His presence..so I decided to write in my journal and an old entry caught my eye and it basically sums up how I feel right now too.. so here it is.. 

“So I haven’t written in a while just cause my head doesn’t feel in the right place.. but not in a bad way.. I am HAPPY, something I have not been in a very long time.  I’m just concerned that my reasons aren’t as they should be.  Obviously after all that has happened it is understandable that I feel this way but am I still keeping God the centre of my life?  Instead of seeking out time to spend with other people I should be using this new found happiness/joy to praise God and to acknowledge that He is the one who has blessed me so.  I realize that I have to give this all to God and wait on Him.  I do not want to put my hope in anything less than His perfect love, grace, and comfort.  He knows what is best, whether I continue to be blessed with the desires of my heart or if He has something better in store for me.  I know I can handle it if God decides to take away all that has come to me.  I have the greatest friends and a family who loves me.. but best of all a God who knows me better than I know myself and who has a plan that is greater than I could ever imagine.  A God who is looking out for me and guiding me every step of the way.

Whom have I in heaven but you?  And earth has nothing I desire besides you.  My flesh and heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. -Psalm 73:25-26

I surrender my plans, knowing that Yours are better.  I open up my heart, trusting You will not let it fall.  I submit my life, hoping to become the follower of Christ I desire to be.  I concentrate my whole self on You, believing that true joy and happiness come from You and You alone.  I don’t want to be seeking God only when I’m stuck, hurting, torn, upset, longing, wanting, sick and dying.  I want to want Him and seek Him every day, hour, minute, and moment.  

You, God, are my God, Earnestly I seek you; I thirst for You, in a dry and parched land where there is no water.  I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory.  Because Your love if better than life, my lips will glorify You.  I will praise You as long as I live, and in Your name I will lift up my hands.  I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. -Psalm 63:1-5”

1 Peter 3:3-4

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewellery or fine clothes.  Rather it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”

my dependance on my phone disgusts me.  Good thing it won’t work in the States next week so i can eliminate that distraction from worship at the conference!  Going to be awesome, worshiping God, making new friends, and not having to worry about school.  so thankful exams are over